November 30, 2005

My last class with Shiori and Hana, these two teenaged girls who evidently seem to hate life. Hallelujah. Bad part about today, there was a HUGE gokiburi on the bookshelf today, just chilling out. I was told they all like went into hibernation or something in the winter. Evidently, not so much. I made my co-worker kill it. Means I'm going to have to still be diligent about food around the house. I was getting more lax, but no more.

November 29, 2005

I got in at like 6 am and headed back on the trains for my little neighbourhood. I was glad to be back where I could feel comfortable and could hide away from the rest of the world. Rested for a bit, threw in laundry. Took my film in for developing and then when I picked up my pictures I discovered another roll of film, so I put it in too.

November 28, 2005

I slept in today and checked out just after eleven. My feet hurt so badly. I dropped my bags off at Kyoto station but it took at least a half hour just to find an available locker. It was a busy day. Everyone and their miniature dogs in hand bags were in Kyoto. I ended up being in a really bad mood. I was worried about what I'd be going home to, me feet hurt like none other, there were insane crowds pretty much everywhere I went. The only place where I got some solitude was at the old Emperor's palace grounds where I found a patch of grass to lay on and have a rest and cry. It was really beautiful out, sunny and the trees around the grounds are cool. Lots of pines that remind me of Oregon and some maples that were in full colour.

I walked around the city more. I tried to find Yasuko, her mum and Robbin, so that I could say thank you to her mum and good bye to all of them. It wasn't meant to be. Instead I found a small temple where I sat and took some pictures, and cried. I went for some kaiten sushi for lunch...and then again for dinner. It was good stuff and reasonably prices. It's a good thing that I don't have a place like that near my house (or like the one in Funabashi) cause I'd be there everyday if I could. To kill some time I went back to the Thai massage place at the hotel near the Old Emperor's Palace and got an hour massage. I walked around some more and I ended up sitting in front of the giant Christmas tree in Kyoto station after dark.
I found Chaffee and then I also saw Christophe from the hostel so we all sat and chilled out watching the crazy people get their pictures taken with the singing Christmas tree. I went to the hotel where the bus was leaving from and found a mall thing inside so I went for some Mister Donut and bought some earrings to go with my new hat. Then off on the bus and home to Ueno, Tokyo.

November 27, 2005

Today was the big wedding day. I got up early to get ready and did my hair before being dressed. I put flowers in my hair and with my dark eyes, hair and hoop earrings, I must admit that pre-kimono I looked more Spanish than Japanese. I met at the station with the Brackens, Chris and Chaffee. We went to the wedding place to be dressed. It took some doing. I was first of the non-Yasuko dressers. They had issues with my boobs. They had to get another special band that cost extra. Fabulous. I was bound down pretty good and for the rest of the day I had a fabric band digging in right across my nipples. It felt just dandy. The rest of the kimono experience wasn't so bad...but that strip of fabric was BRUTAL at times. So after being dressed and Robbin having her hair done we all headed downstairs where the men had been waiting for a very long time. It's not that we took longer than expected, we were right on schedule but it took like a half hour for each of us, and like an hour and a bit to dress Yasuko.

We got into taxis and headed for the shrine. The roof of the taxi opened up so they could fit Yasuko's head in the taxi. Her hair was so high and the hat thing so tall that it didn't all fit in the car so they had to take part of it off while she was in the car. All us ladies had these rope things around the seat in front of us so that we could hold onto the rope to keep us from sitting back in our seats. You don't want to squish the obi (that the big wide thing of fabric around the waist).

Once at the shrine we went into this big banquet looking room. I sat near the Brackens and I think we were all at a loss of what to do. There were some of Chris' host families at the same table as us, but most barely speak any English anymore so there wasn't a whole lot of small talk. I guess that Chris and Yasuko had to sign some stuff or something but it was a little unclear as to why we were there. We had some mochi looking things but it wasn't. They were different. Some sort of rice and anko celebration goodness. They were yummy.

Then we all set off for the actual shrine, shrine. We all lined up outside with Yasuko and Chris at the front with a big umbrella thing over them. We lined up behind the person we were there for, so Yasuko's family was behind her and we were all behind Chris. Of course there was a bit of a kuffuffle over me being at the back as the shrine people (I don't know what they're called, like nuns, but not) just saw "white girl in kimono" and figured I must be the sister so they're trying to move me around to a family spot as I'm like "Imooto janai, tomodachi desu" and the translator is trying to come to my rescue and it was all terribly annoying as it was fuss over me, which I hate anyway, at a time when all fuss should have been over Chris and Yasuko. Oh, above that means, 'I'm not the sister, I'm a friend'. So we all walked to the main shrine area then up to a side part where we took off our shoes in silence and went into one of two small doors that led into a little room. That was were the ceremony took place. There were seats on either side of the room that we sat on with Yasuko's people on one side and Chris' people on the other and Chris and Yasuko in the middle (with a few over flow of Yasuko's friends behind them as well). I don't know what went on in the ceremony but in the corner there were three guys who played these cool Japanese instruments at certain times. There was some stuff said and they sipped some sake then the parents sipped some sake (they were only supposed to sip once but Chris didn't tell them that so they did the same as Chris and Yasuko and did it three times, of course her parents were wonderful and when it was their turn, they sipped three times as well so that the Bracken's saved face) and some more words and then we prayed (clap twice, bow, clap once more). It was really cool to be a part of it. We headed outside for some pictures. We had one with all of us, then lots of Chris and Yasuko and some with their families. There were also a tonne of kids around as it was Shichi-Go-San where kids who are 7, 5 and 3 go to the shrine for blessings. They come in full traditional dress. Too cute. They were everywhere. There was also two other weddings at the shrine at the same time.

We got into taxis again and headed for the restaurant. I'll write about this later.

Chaffee and I got into a taxi for the last time today and headed back for the hotel. It was fun trying to give the taxi driver directions of where to go and then we tried to get him to stop and he wouldn't cause he thought that we were lost, but we knew exactly what we wanted to do. We dropped off some stuff and then went for a really long walk south of Kyoto station. We came across Toji temple which, I believe used to be the tallest pagoda in Japan. It may still be, I'm not sure. Maybe it's just the oldest. I'll have to look that up. We found a random art gallery and went in for a quick look then walked back to the hotel. I got in and talked to Christophe, this German guy here who wanted to see some pictures of the day. Now I'm going to hit the hay by 10:30 and sleep for as long as I can.

November 26, 2005

I took my own sweet ass time getting out of bed this morning. I couldn't be bothered to do anything. I met up with the Brackens at their hotel just before 11 and after some more stalling we set out in search of this huge long food market. It was fun to watch Mrs Bracken stop and faun over each stall. We saw all sorts of fish and pickled goodness and such. We came out the other end at a big shopping district full of random shops. Then began the fun of trying to find a subway station to take me to meet Chris and Yasuko. We walked along way only to discover once I met with Chris, that we met just across the river from where we were to begin with. Ah the joys of traveling. On the way to the restaurant with Chris and Yasuko we walked through a shrine (I can't remember the name). In the middle of it there was a bunch of people doing a sword thing display. It was pretty cool but we were in a hurry so we had to keep moving. Chris, Yasuko and I went to the restaurant together to finish some planning and set up. We took about an hour longer than we had anticipated and were very late for dinner at the Kobayashi's. It meant that the Brackens and the Kobayashi's were left alone, with no interpreter, for a very long time. They evidently did just fine together. We finally arrived and had a wonderful dinner of Sukiyaki. It's a big hot pot with meat and fish and greeny goodness and mushrooms and tofu. We ate too much. Then we had to hoof it back to Kyoto station so that I could make curfew on time and not get locked out of my dorm, without a shower. I actually made it in time to shower quick but then I discovered that someone had jacked my one and only little hand towel, so I had to dry myself off with my hoodie and then wrap my hair in it and put clothes on before leaving the shower area. Good times. Good times in hostels.

November 25, 2005

I arrived in Kyoto at like 6:30 in the morning after a really bad sleep on the bus. I just couldn't get comfortable and then because I had taken a melatonin I was all grumpy cause I was sooo tired but I couldn't sleep. Made me grumpy for all of today. That and my feet and back hurting. I must say though that I got a lot accomplished in the way of sight-seeing today.

I dumped my bag to start with at the hostel and then hoofed it north to try and find a subway station. That took me out to near Nenzo-ji or whatever the fat it's called. That was supposed to be the start of Philosopher's Walk from there, and easy to find, but it was far from it. My guide book has been pretty good in regards to all things Tokyo (although it is missing a lot of things that I think should be in there), but it's like someone came and spent like an afternoon here in Kyoto and then wrote things about it like a year later when their memory is all fuzzy. I do need to take this occasion to rant right now about maps. I think I am going to go on a world wide crusade to make sure that all maps posted are directionally situated in the reality of the area. So when you are at a station and lost and you are all excited cause you've found a map that will tell you where to go, you will actually be able to find the items on said map...as opposed to getting more lost than you were to begin with. When you look at the map and it looks like you turn right to get to where you are going, then it should actually be a right that you turn in the real world from the situation of the map. That only makes sense!!! But nooooo. And it's not just posted maps. It's tourist maps as well that have a main street as the centre of the map and then everything situated around it so that it looks like everything runs either North-South or East-West. If this is NOT the case then the maps should have a North directional indication to specify such. Okay. I'm done now.

So I set off from the Nen's Zen, G - Temple (as I have aptly named it to give homage to Nen, it's actually Nanzen-ji) and went in the direction of the crowd. Oh, before I left, there's this cool huge red-brick aqueduct thing that is STILL IN USE. It was totally cool. I thought of Granddad when I was up there and I know he would have gotten a total kick out of how they had designed it and built it way back when and all that. So I did eventually find the Walk. It runs along a beautiful canal that's lined with cherry trees that are all turning red and little shops selling fun touristy (and surprisingly, mostly well done, nothing exceptionally tacky till later on) things. There's a couple more temples along the route and I think I like a couple of them better than the big draw temples. One was a nunnery that had the most beautiful, simple garden. It wasn't very big and it cost 500 to get in but it was well worth the money. The route ends at "The Silver Shrine", Ginkaku-ji, which never did receive it's planned silver coating so it's all wood and I think it's much better that way, as fond as I am of silver and all. It was really crowded but it had a certain quality that was above par to the rest.

I made my way back to Kyoto Station on the bus, falling asleep every two minutes, I just couldn't stay awake. And by now I was really grumpy and back in the city. I decided to try and get to the hotel that I had first wanted to stay at but it was full to see about getting a Thai massage. They were available so I had this very nice lady pull me in all sorts of random directions. She was very nice and she kept telling me what I beautiful face I had. She thought I was Spanish. Ah. It's nice to be traveling again and to have people think I'm more beautiful than I am. That's the way it's supposed to be, as opposed to all these dumb ass Japanese who just look down on you for not being one of them and supposedly fat. From the massage in the hotel I walked over to the Old Imperial Palace. I will have to go back when the light is better. It was 3:30 and the sun was already going down so we were passed the good shadows stage. I got on the subway to try and find Nijo castle and had some difficulties with the maps posted and the one in my book. Grrr. Then the guide book said that the last admission was 4:00. Well, I guess I won't be going in. It was late and I was getting even more grumpy than I was before so I decided to try and make my way back to the hostel. I ended up right back at the same subway that I had had issues with the map at. Double grrr. But I made it and I'm here and I'm going to go to bed now. It's 6 pm. I don't even want to go out and walk to find some food, my feet are THAT sore. You know it's got to be bad if Michelle doesn't even think that food is worth it. That's really bad.

November 24, 2005

At school I actually had a good time teaching. Ami in my MT1 class was pissing me off. She cries all the time now and for no reason. She won't do anything herself unless I'm sitting right next to her. I can tell her things, but if I'm not right beside her then she won't do them. Then the ET2 class. We played what time is it Mr Wolf. It was a crowd pleaser. And they got stickers. It was a good class. The clincher today was the ET4 class with the kids who don't like me. They don't hate me anymore. It's Misako (girl)'s birthday tomorrow so I gave them Candy Corn. The best was playing Dance of the Ostriches. The kids get a card on their back and they are trying to see what the other person has without letting them see what they have. It's priceless. After the two boys played I had to make a rule about no touching or it could get really violent. It was great fun.

Then off for the bus station. I got on the bus and bunkered down for the night. It was small and uncomfortable, but not too bad. I'm glad I'm short.

November 23, 2005

I talked to Mum and Dad till like 3 last night cause I figured I'd be able to sleep in this morning. Not so much. Nomura san called me at like 8:30 to tell me that he had gotten my email and would be glad to come with me to the Elementary school. I finally fell back asleep when the gas guy who was supposed to come on Dec 5th between 1 and 2 showed up at my door at 10. Well that was it. I was up. I made plans with Chris to meet and I discovered that the museum with the Hokusai exhibit was open today, so I headed into Tokyo just after 12. I really didn't want to go anywhere today.

I went around the museum a little bit. I couldn't get into the Hokusai exhibit, it was too busy for the short time I had, I never would have made it. So I went in the general Asian collection. Some thing about seeing carvings of a god from over 4000 years ago makes me weep. I headed out to Asakusa to meet Chris and Yasuko and the Brackens in front of the Sensoji temple gate. We were all late, I was lost and they were just late so it worked out just fine. We walked down the route of all the booths, I think the Brackens would have stopped at everyone if they could have. We ate sembe and looked at all the touristy things. We got to the temple and took some pictures, got our fortunes and went in the temple. Mr B and a good fortune. Yasuko's was regular, Chris, Mrs B and I all had bad fortunes. Mine was officially bad, but I kind of liked it "You cannot go forward, you must return to your home country. In your home country you will not find conflict, you will be at peace." I'm okay with that. My other favourite part was, "The person you are looking for will come, but will be late". I'll read that how I want to read that. Unfortunate that I don't believe it. As I was shaking the container I was praying that only the Lord would be in my fortune, and then I shook and shook and nothing would come out. It was quite funny. I was starting to figure that I was to die tomorrow as I didn't have a fortune. We went around the side of the temple and found some booths to eat at. They had some takoyaki (octopus balls), Robbin had some okonomiyaki (cabbage, veggie, Japanese pizza goodness) and I had a GIANT long hotdog. Then we got some deep fried mochi.

We went from there we were done eating and we took the subway to a kitchen district. There's some incredibly beautiful pottery there. Then we decided to go pick up my bag full of stuff to go back to Canada, I don't think the Brackens are going to be able to take ANY of it, and head home. I talked with Yasuko about the kekkon shiki MC stuff and I left them at Tokyo station.

Now I'm packing for Kyoto and I need to shut off the comp so that I can get it in the bag first and then pack everything else around it.

November 21, 2005

I met the Brackens today at 11 in at Gotanda, that way they only had one easy train to brave by themselves. From there, we headed to Tokyo station to try and find the Imperial Palace. The biggest difficulty was trying to find an exit to get out of the freaking building. Then we walked across the road and off into the big city. It was fun to see the Brackens so excited about everything around them. They wanted to stop and look at all the trees and plants. It probably would have driven Chris crazy cause he's like that, but I loved seeing Tokyo through their eyes. It's like experiencing Christmas morning through the eyes of a 4 year old. Everything is still magical and surprising and different and unexpected. It was just what I needed after the really crappy week I've had. I'm hitting another bout of either home sickness or culture shock, or more likely both at the same time, so listening to them admire everything around them from the clean streets, to the different flora, to the trains that are on time...confusing, but on time, really helped me to be able to look around again with new eyes and say, "Yeah, I live somewhere cool. I live in Japan. When else am I going to be here to experience this."

So we saw the Imperial Palace grounds as the main part of the Palace you obviously can't go into as there's people, Imperial people, living there. We decided to walk all the way around it which was quite the distance but it was really pleasant and an absolutely beautiful day. The sun was out for most of the day and it wasn't warm so it was crisp and beautiful. We came around the side where the Buddokan is and went down to the subway from there to Ginza the shopping district. We found a random little restaurant to have lunch. We had a brief Japanese lesson again at the table and a nice meal. Robbin kept trying out her Japanese on the waitress. It was great fun. Then we hit the washroom before walking some more. She found the toilets with the controls. I laughed. Lots. She even took pictures of the controls. You all thought I was making this up before about the toilets. I'm not the only one infatuated with the mystery that is Japanese toiletry. After lunch we walked around Ginza a bit. We went to the Apple store which is unbelievable. I think Coulter would end up being the troll that lives in the corner that never leaves if he were ever to enter the door. Then Robbin and I went in a giant paper store that has 9, yes count them, 9 floors of stationary type items. We barely hit 3 floors and our feet gave out on us. We met back up with Keith and we were on our way back to Tokyo station where we split up for the evening.

November 20, 2005

I went over to Narita today to meet Mr and Mrs Bracken at the airport with Chris and Yasuko. It was so good to see them, they both looked fantastic. We decided to take the JR Express back into Tokyo as opposed to trying to brave the regular JR lines with all the baggage. It was a great ride. It went from Narita to Chiba City to Tokyo. Most excellent. That's the way to see Chiba! We flew by Makuhari Hongo and at about 100 miles an hour I was able to "point out" our school there. It was great to watch Mr Bracken looking out the window. He just sat there taking it all in with this very contented grin on his face. Mrs Bracken is full of questions and wanting to know all about cultural stuff and bits of language. It's so great to see them both so excited and interested in this culture that their son has fallen in love with. They didn't look tired at all but seemed really excited to take in all that they could as quickly as possible.

We managed to get all the luggage and ourselves home to Yasuko and Chris' place without too much hassle. We chatted for a bit then decided to head to the grocery store to get some dinner. We made a hot pot kind of thing with chopped up greens, mushrooms, tofu and cod and snapper. It was delish. Robbin had her first full glass of beer, or so she thought. She wasn't sure if maybe she had had a glass of beer with some Indian food once. All in all it was a great welcome to Japan. I headed home to rescue Drlfan from the street and get some very needed sleep.

November 16, 2005

I'm a planning machine. I have all my Wednesday classes except the two privates planned all the way up to Christmas break or quitting time. Heck yeah. I have one class (private 2 girls who hate the class) that is canceling at the end of this month and another private student that isn't coming for like three weeks. I think that the first week in December I will actually be done work at like 6 o'clock. If that's true, I'm sooo going swimming that night.

I had another delightful morning with Kiyoko and friends. There was another lady, Naoko, there who spoke English very well but she had only learned in Jr High and High School. I was impressed. Then Michiko arrived a bit later. We made pressed flower postcards. Sachiko, I think that's her name, arrived quite late, just in time for eating. We had some lunch, most of which I couldn't eat and although last time I indulged, my skin is in such bad shape right now that I decided to play it safe, eat very little, and take a bunch home with me to give to Matthew. I had some candies that are from Kyoto. The Princess was married yesterday, to a commoner no less, and they had the same candies as the wedding gifts. I also learned about some candy that they eat at Shichi Go San (7-5-3 Festival) that's called Chi tose ame (one thousand candy) which is a Thousand Year Candy that if you eat it you're to live for a thousand years. Unless of course you're an insulin dependent diabetic. Then maybe not so much as a thousand years.

My house is feeling quite cozy now that everything is moved into the one room and I can crowd in all sorts of books and crap and turn on the heat and take off my shirt and it's a happy little Michelle room.

November 15, 2005

Work is stupid. Lots of politics and people aren't doing their jobs. Reactive management all over the place. A fax was sent out today all about this and that and be sure to always be in your dress code and don't bother the receptionists and something else stupid and piddly. As far as I can tell it's problems with one or two certain teachers. This is not the right way to go about things. You have a situation. It needs to be dealt with. But it doesn't concern the entire school, or even MOST of the teaching staff. Deal with the people directly that need to be dealt with and allow the others to continue in the positive environment they were living in. It is ineffective and demoralizing to come down hard on an entire staff when it is the actions of one or two that need to be modified. This is the aspect of reactive management that I don't like. Managers come up against a difficult situation and of course you don't want to have to deal with it again so instead of talking to the people directly they involve all staff in an attempt to curb any future unwanted behaviours. The problem with this thinking is that it does nothing to actually curb the behaviour at hand because the specific perpetrators probably have no idea that they are causing grief. Instead it causes the staff as a whole (most of whom are completely abiding by appropriate behaviour and guide lines) to question each other as well as themselves. I saw the fax and immediately I felt like I was being scolded. I then started to think of all the things that could possibly be a problem. I often talk to receptionists, I think that we should be encouraged to do so, so that we all feel like we're part of a greater team as opposed to the divisiveness that occurs with an us vs. them mentality (which I have seen actually lead to racism at the school, all the Japanese receptionists are stupid, all the gaijin teachers are stuck up and conceited). So now I start doubting myself. Who have I offended? What have I said wrong? Upon reflection there's a darn good chance that it has absolutely NOTHING to do with me but because it is out there, although due to only a minute few individual's behaviour, I feel like I need to be walking on egg shells.

There is much that I want to complain about and to say to help them improve, but quite frankly I don't want to rock the boat so I will continue on my path, doing as I believe is within the bounds of the framework they have set for us, and I will keep my mouth shut.

It's officially winter. People everywhere are complaining about how cold it is. I checked the weather report. It's only 10 degrees at night. I don't believe it. It feels way colder than it does on the island. Not that it's bad, and certainly not as bad as people make it out to be. All you need is a sweater under your jacket and away you go. The mornings are pretty chilled though, I have to admit. Especially seeing that tonight is clear. It drops pretty good with no cloud cover, which is why I don't believe it's only ten. That said, I have had my heater on the last two nights. I may like it cooler, but I still like to lie around with no clothes on. Not that I've been able to, even with the heater on. It's still kinda drafty.

Last night I moved my kotatsu into my tatami room. I feel all cozy and much more comfortable sitting on my bed as I'm on the comp. So now I have an entire room in my house that is completely empty except the closet in the room, my rice cooker, and some jackets and packs that are hung on the wall. I may move a coat or two into this room now where I used to hang my yukata. The surprising thing is that even with the heater on, my closet and all the clothes therein are positively ice. I even leave the door open, the heat just doesn't seem to make it's way into the space.

November 8, 2005

I really didn't want to go to work today. It's become so mind-numbing. I don't know what it is about Tuesday and Wednesday, but I don't like them. I think it's the plethora of Adult classes and Privates between those two days. Makes it really suck.

November 7, 2005

I had a very busy day today. I started off by dragging my sorry, old, stiff (and surprisingly firm, no really, it is, ask Taeko) butt up off the floor to a beautiful sunny day. This was supposed to be my sunny day yesterday when I could sit and enjoy the sun for hours. That's fine. Victoria is 8 degrees and raining. I'll take sunny even if I'm planning on being inside. My first stop is my Japanese lesson with Nomura-san. It was rather traumatic leaving the house today as I was late and things kept going wrong. I forgot the flowers for Nomura-san that I got him for being a no-show last week so I had to go back. Then I dropped the flowers on 3 separate occasions. I did actually make the train so that I wasn't late for the lesson but I had to kick it on my bike so hard (today I really did hate having only one gear on my bike, oh how I longed for my old 5 speed road bike) and I hadn't eaten that I got on the train and thought I was going to pass out. That's not an exaggeration. I know I have a tendency to over dramatize on occasions, but this was not one of them. I was having flash backs of the last time I felt this awful on public transportation and I was taken back to the time I ended up in the hospital because my blood sugar had reached death-defying levels. Again, not an exaggeration. The ambulance guy said that my blood sugar level wasn't registering on his chart and that I was at about .3. A normal level is between over 7.0 and under 11.0. Most people should sit in around 8-9. It is life threatening when it reaches 2.0. I was at 0.3. It was death-defying. So as I'm sitting down on the train and propping my head up on my hands I'm getting these really bad visions of standing up Nomura-san yet again. But I recovered eventually and took my sweet time to get off the train when we got to the final station and I had a very enjoyable lesson with Nomura-san. We learned about verbs. It was nothing new that I hadn't learned at one time in High School, but I don't remember much of anything from Japanese class in High School. There were like 3 moments during the lesson when he'd say something and I'd be like "Wait, I know this..." and then he'd say what it means and I'd freak out being all "I totally used to know that but I'd forgotten it until you said it". It was weird almost 'feeling' my synapses re-routing themselves to access lost information.

After my lesson I headed back on the train only a couple of stops to meet with my friend and a receptionist at the school, Taeko. Her and another teacher and I had made plans a bit ago to get together and do some stuff that I'm not going to say because it will ruin the surprise for some. Just know that we were crafty and we had a fabulous afternoon at her house talking and laughing and making fun of each other. We had lunch out on her deck in the beautiful sun. She said she had heard the weather report was that it would possibly reach 26 degrees today. I believe it. It was like summer in Victoria. It actually wasn't too hot, or at least that's what our acclimatized bodies told us anyway. It was beautiful out and we had fabulously good healthy food and it was great. We finished off the rest of our projects and it was time to head out.

I've been having a really hard time connecting with a doctor here and last Friday Taeko-sama was wonderful enough to find me a doctor at a Clinic right here in the area (about a 23 minute walk from my house) who can actually speak English. It was an odd experience but I'm glad to finally find someone that I can go to with any health issues that may arise. The funniest thing to me, okay so it's not actually the funniest thing but I'm not going to share the funniest thing with the masses, if you want to know then email me and I'll tell you but you need to really want to know, so the second funniest thing were the forms that I had to fill out. There weren't very many so that was kind of a good thing, but not a good thing in disguise. They were so vague and minimal that there wasn't any way to give any (in my mind) pertinent health information. It was just a "Choose from this list of symptoms and go sit down" like as if there is no other possible problems from the 12 listed you may have or that things may be intertwined. My favourite on the multi-lingual list is that there's little G-rated pictures of the problems. The best one was a woman who looked sad and had a dancing baby head above her with 2 x's on either side of the dancing head. It was the picture for 'infertility'. It made Taeko and I giggle.

I went home. Made some potato-y, zucchini-y (you have no idea how excited I was to find a zuc yesterday at the Hanamasa...soooo excited), garlic-y, mushroom-y goodness for dinner. I wanted to eat all of it but I decided to be good and save half for lunch tomorrow. It will make me happy tomorrow to have yummy food to eat instead of either going hungry and cranky or eating at the Matsuya (cheap and often good, but I've had enough now to last my life). I watched two episodes of "30 Days" that I downloaded overnight. If you haven't heard of the show or checked it out yet, you must. It's by Morgan Spurlock who also did Super-Size Me. This guy is a total stud and my hero. The idea is that people go on these 30 day "social experiments" that are completely beyond their lifestyle or beliefs to see how they cope and, hopefully, learn. I watched the one were a totally straight, football playing, 24 year old Uni graduate, sheltered Christian from Po-Dunk Missouri town of 8000 people goes to live in a flat with a gay man in Castro in San Fran. It was right up my alley and I really like the episode. There were still a few things that got me riled up, mostly footage of poo-faced ultra conservative "Christians" spewing the usual good news of the gracious gospel of Christ. Of Love and of Grace and of the knowledge that I am no good but Jesus is good and He says that if I love Him then He'll stand in front of me so that I look good like Him. Um, yeah. They certainly weren't holding signs that said "When gays die, God laughs". No, they wouldn't say something as horrible, unloving, ungracious, inhumane, self-righteous and (I'm running out of words but not out of fury) UNTRUTHFUL as that. They're Christians. They've been commissioned with "This is my command: Love each other." They're the ones who have been given the knowledge of God's forgiveness for everything in our fallen human nature (which happens to include my abnormal obsession of peanut butter and wandering eyes, and hands, for yummy boys and everything in between and beyond), why should they think they are any better than the next person. We have all fallen short and no matter what your definition of sin (is my desire to kiss a boy any more "sinful" than another girls desire to kiss a girl?? Mmmm, kissing is good) we're all in the same place before our maker.

I just got off Skype with Brandon in Nashville and, among other points of conversation (btw, he just signed a record deal, I'm so excited for him), we were talking about the above. The guy in the show went to a gay church right on Castro. He had a couple of conversations with the pastor there. It was interesting. Her best point I think was that the guy's biggest issue with homosexuality is that it says directly in the bible that it's not pleasing to God. It also says in the bible that killing is not a good thing to do. The guy is in the US Army, "So do you carry a gun in the Army?" Yes, of course he carries a gun. Would he ever kill anyone? Of course he would, to protect the people of America and his country. But the bible says, don't kill people. It's an interesting course of thought. We both agreed that it was a good point. My mind reels with thoughts of 'If he's willing to rationalize away a commandment then why would the thought that anybody else could rationalize something else be wrong?' Is it only him who's right to do so? Does that mean they love God any less? Essentially it looks like most people who get incredibly black and white on bible interpretation only want said interpretation to go their way as they feel they are just as Just as God to make judgment decisions. I don't think I have any answers to anything, that's not my job...I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm not God. It's not my job, it's His, and in that I need to step back and let God be God. We can't save the world. We're not the Messiah. Seems to be a recurring theme in my life lately, but in so many different venues and forms, it's interesting.

Now it's almost 3 so I'm going to bed. Je ne veux pas travailler. Je ne veux pas dejeuner. Je veux seulement oublie, et puis je fume. Okay, okay, so I'm not going to smoke. Right now.

November 6, 2005

Not so much sleeping naked in a sun beam all day, as chilling in front of the comp as I listened to the teeming rain. I did 1 brief excursion into town and rode around the neighbourhoods on my bike in the rain. It felt good to get out. I got back with some groceries just as a downpour was about to start. Nice timing.

I think I can honestly say that I am finally enjoying the thought of living in Japan. I find that there are things around me that I want to engage with and experience. I have more of a draw lately to cultural aspects of the big city of Tokyo that I want to be able to take in. Things like, the National Museum has an exhibit of Ukiyo-e prints until Dec 4th. I was thinking of going today, but I think I'll stick around here and maybe go next weekend. I would like to go find some flea markets, just to see what I can find. I am learning a little bit more of the language, which I still have little desire to fully learn, but it's nice to want to get the difference between 'kore' and 'are' (pronounced ko-ray and a-ray). I have had my thoughts move more toward being aware of leaving. It's different before. I used to think of leaving in the sense that it felt so far off and I wanted the time (we're talking pretty much just the months of July and August during the unbearable heat and humidity, I've learned I will never be able to live in South East Asia) to go as fast as possible. About a month ago, I started to see things through the light of being aware of enjoying them while I can because my opportunities to do so will soon be no more.

Things that I will miss when I leave Japan:

I will miss the oranges that have come out this season. It's Japanese oranges season. They're sweet and juicy and easy to peel. I usually eat between 2-4 everyday. They aren't uber cheap, but they certainly aren't expensive, especially when you buy them off the street. And I do literally mean "off the street", or maybe I should be more specific and say "off the sidewalk" cause that's where you can often buy the best produce.

I will miss buying produce off the sidewalk. It's usually some cute old man just sitting out there with a truck parked on the street, a couple of tatami mats put down on the concrete sidewalk and the producing sitting out there in baskets, complete with dirt still on them. You know they're fresh when. The clams on the other hand...not so fresh I would think. I haven't bought clams from the guy who sells them. I think that's one experience I'm willing to bypass, in honour of all the other experiences I would never get to have if I were to take that one.

I will miss alternate forms of transportation from motorized personal vehicles. I will miss Drlfan, my most fabulous bike. I like that it's the norm for so many people to ride their bikes around. Of the four "families" in my building, only one (the actual family with kids, the rest of us are single occupants) has motorized vehicles. I have to admit that it causes me to not want to leave my house tomorrow as I will have to brave the rain, but when compared to owning a vehicle it's an occasional nuisance. I will also miss the trains. I won't miss being stared at on the trains, I won't miss the over-crowded trains at peak times, I won't miss missing the last train of the night and being stranded in what ever place you are until five or six the next morning. But generally speaking the trains are a cheap, easy and reliable form of transportation. And a great time to catch up on your sleep.

I will miss sembe. It's this fabulous rice crackery snacky goodness that's crunchy and yummy. It's not rice crackers as we know them, or rice cakes. Sembe is completely different and I will miss its crunchy goodness.

I will miss having the opportunity to trek into the coolest, hippest, craziest mega-city in the world. There are so many parts of Tokyo that are just insane and I do like being able to have the opportunity to be thankful that I don't have to live in that world everyday but to enjoy it in small doses. I had the thought before back in the early summer that if I could be married to some rich guy and didn't have to work and could live up in shwanky Roppongi Hills or somewhere cool like Omotosando and I could have indoor heating and cooling, I would possibly really enjoy Tokyo. Tokyo has a lot to offer in the way of restaurants and arts and shopping and parks and interesting people. It really is a world class city.

I will miss [name deleted to protect the innocent].

I'm sure I will make a bigger list of things I will miss when the time comes for me to go. As is I'm just barely half way through my jaunt here. It's just not time to think of leaving yet. I have become more aware of the things that I enjoy here and as such I am aware that I will miss them when the time comes.

November 5, 2005

Life is just messy right now. My flat is the messiest that I think it has ever been and for the longest. I'm looking forward to tomorrow to clean and maybe exercise and find people to chat with from home. The nice thing right now is that the weather is stunning. It's sunny and crisp and about 20 degrees during the day and perfectly lovely. I think I may have to find a sun beam to lie in tomorrow, for like all day, naked. Don't worry, it won't be in public. I love my giant sliding glass doors. Sure I hated them in the summer and usually try to block out all light with my shutters, but this time of year, as the West Coast is enveloped in its usual 9 month long drizzle and fog, I'm in sunniness.

I'm only going to feel worse tomorrow cause in my second to last class tonight I had my one private class that I actually enjoy, Makiko a totally rad 14 year old, and we were talking about food and that made me think of the chicken masala at Shanti, the Indian restaurant half-way between my place and Kita school. Of course, being the undisciplined glutton that I am, I went...and I ate Nan instead of rice. I'm a bad, bad girl and I really don't care. It's funny how now when I think of things that I just ate that are bad for me sitting in my tummy I'll sometimes get this anxious feeling that I need to puke. It borders on nausea for just a split second and then it's gone. Tomorrow I will have all that lovely, beautiful, sweet, soft and chewy Nan trying to make it's way out of my system. But dang it was good!! Best Indian food I think I've ever had. They're actually Nepalese, but it's still called Shanti Indian Restaurant, so close enough. There's a really nice kid who works there. It's his dad and two other men in the kitchen, some other family members and friends, and himself. He's only like 19 years old and they've only been in Japan for like 5 months. He seems like he's a pretty lonely kid. I've been to the restaurant a couple of times (tonight was my third time) and he always remembers my name. I see him on the street every now and again and he usually calls my name from the other side of the street. Last time I saw him I crossed over on my bike and was like "Hey, how ya doing?" and he's "Good, good. I'm on a break" "Oh, that's good" "Well, goodbye". Okay then, I thought we were going to have a conversation, but no, I guess not. He's a sweet kid.

Dental care in Japan is sadly lacking. As I told Marcus recently, Japan is full of people who would be beautiful but aren't. Lots of hot bodies, particularly the ladies but also the guys, and then they turn around a smile and there's teeth where there aren't supposed to be teeth and you're like "Damn, that ain't good". I am currently brushing my teeth and I find that the toothpaste, despite being "Aquafresh", is gritty. It is still Japanese Aquafresh. For a people who are so concerned with outward appearance of propriety, their teeth are far, far behind the rest of the "modernized world". They have cell phones with actual 8 gig hard-drives coming out next year, but they can't figure out these fandangled contraptions called braces.

November 4, 2005

A usual day at work today. I really like all the people that I teach on Fridays. It's just a good solid day. The adult class with Yumi, Mari and Akiko can still be difficult, but today was a good day. The kids were really crazy but I've gotten to the point where I just don't really care if they learn anything or not. The Jr Highs with Yuichi, Izumi and Tomomi is fun as always. They all look terribly bored and tired but I know they like me. I need to make things a little more fun for them. It's difficult when Tomomi and Yuichi are on such different levels. She's lost most of the time and his bored cause it's too easy most of the time. I finished off the day with my Returnees, Shunsuke didn't show up again today so for the third week in a row it's just been me and Takuya. He's such a good kid and really interactive so I certainly don't mind. It means that we can spend time just on him. I hope he's improving, or at least not loosing more.

November 3, 2005

I had a great day with today. I met a fellow Christian teacher at the park and we sat in the sun and talked about our lives and our faith and stuff. It was good. Then we went back to her place for melon and vanilla ice cream. We watched some Kirk Franklin Live and talked some more and then we prayed. We were supposed to meet another teacher that we work with at the station but that didn't happen (tonight when I got home I discovered an email from her at 4:15 saying that she wasn't going to come, we were just glad that it meant she wasn't waiting for us somewhere thinking that we'd ditched her). We headed off for Funabashi in search of sushi and we found yet another teacher that we both work with, although not together (I hope that makes sense, it does in my head), hanging around the Tsudanuma JR Station. We invited him along for sushi. It was yummy and we ate a lot. He decided to head home so the two of us went into Tokyo on our own. We unfortunately took a slow train and had the wrong start time for the concert that her husband was playing in, but it meant that we had even more time to talk. It was in this beautiful garden area of the French Institute of Tokyo. It was a beautiful night to be outside and I loved hearing all the different languages around (mostly French, English and Japanese). The little bit of music that we did hear was lots of fun. A positively delightful day of real, face to face, fellowship. It was good. I have the usual remorse of a closed, independent spirited, guarded person that I've shared too much about myself as well as betraying trust put on my by others, but I know that it will be a good thing in the long run. She's a good person. It's funny how I have such a desire to share my heart and yet it still holds such a fear and anxiety over me to be known. It was a good day.

November 2, 2005

Crap ass day today. I woke up in a bad way and after checking in at the school, I left in a bad mood. Lots of nagging going on and I couldn't keep my head straight to get done what I needed to in the span of 10 minutes. That meant that I missed the train. Then my head got all wrapped up in itself and once I finally got on a train, I went right by my stop which meant that I had to turn back around on another train to get back. I got to the school about an hour later than I had wanted to and I had nothing planned so I had to think fast and figure out six lesson plans in the span of just over an hour and a half. When I got to the school I discovered a lovely note that was up for all to see from "the Thursday teachers" to the Wednesday teachers, that's me and one other. It was a rather "polite" note asking us to clean up after ourselves because we left the school a "mess" after Hallowe'en week last week. I would admit that I left 2 small baskets on the inappropriate shelves. It would have taken two seconds to put away. They were in the class that the other teacher has for the last 2 hours of the day so there was nothing I could do about cleaning it up because he has a class in there till after nine. The tone of the note was the thing. It was very patronizing. I know who wrote it. I have decided that I don't like this person. I saw this person at Kita on Tuesday as I was heading down the stairs and they were coming up. I looked up and smiled and said "Hey". I got the cold shoulder as they just walked by me. I got to the bottom of the stairs and thought to myself, "[deleted for Mum and Terri's sake, again]. What was that about?" Today I understood. That's what the cold shoulder was about. I don't like this person. They will never know. They're just jealous that I'm hotter!!!

November 1, 2005

I'm tired. I was a planning machine today. I went in at noon and left at 9:25, I took 10 minutes for dinner and other than that I was either prepping resources or planning or teaching. It's exhausting. I may have done something really dumb last night. We'll see how things pan out.

It's getting colder. Nights feel down right cold now. Note that I say FEEL. It's still only like 13 or so at night, but it feels colder. Probably because my core body temperature was raised up to about 50 C over the summer so now everything feels cooler than it is. It also makes a diff that there isn't any central heating. If it's 13 degrees out, then it's 13 degrees in. Seeing that it's the first of November I think I need to have a ceremonial plugging in of the kotatsu table. Now my feet will be warm as I eat popcorn and watch some downloaded tv. Smells like burning. Probably because it hasn't been turned on in like six months. Today was a beautiful day though. The sun was out, it was all blue skies. Absolutely lovely. Too bad I was stuck inside all day.